Judah sent me this story a week ago and I reluctantly passed on it. But as fate would have it, the story has blossomed in to a full-fledged freak festival. As a result, it is my duty to report it now.

On Ash Wednesday last month it seemed as if a miracle had taken place in the most peculiar of places. In the cafeteria at Pugh Elementary School in Houston Texas, the Virgin Mary made an unscheduled appearance on a pizza pan.

Lupe Rodriguez who was scrubbing the pans that afternoon made the shocking discovery. A quick analysis by her coworkers confirmed that it was indeed the Virgin Mary. No question about it.

Standard miracle protocol dictates for the image to be put on public display and that is exactly what happened. The miracle pizza-baking sheet was immediately enshrined outside a local home for all to see. Hundreds of delusional worshippers brought flowers and candles. Prayers were everywhere and tears were abundant. All was well, or so it would seem.

The school suddenly demanded that the miracle pizza-baking sheet be returned immediately. The faithful reluctantly agreed and set off on a pilgrimage back to the school. With the miracle pizza sheet in hand, the women sang and carried roses and somberly marched towards the school.

With tensions running high, the local church was consulted on the matter. Only time will tell where this miracle of sorts will finally come to rest. It brings tears to my eyes just thinking about it.